Life... To Be Continued

This blog is closed. Grace and peace to all. Here's to the next chapters of our lives. =)

Writing to save my life (it's a book I own). I'm not going to say it's that extreme, but I am writing to save myself from going insane. I have to let my thoughts out somewhere, and what better way to do that than by typing them out here?


There ARE things that drive me crazy. I am not a patient person in all situations. As much as I hate to admit it, I probably get it from my mother, or my grandparents. It's funny how that goes. Most people, if they were completely honest, would have to admit that they are somehow like their parents, even if they were trying their best not to be. I'm like my mother in some ways. My mom is like my grandma in some ways. My girlfriend is like her mother in too many ways =P
Anyway, yes, I just thought I'd point that out.

Something random. I find it strange when married couples have one facebook account. I mean, I guess it's ok if it's a mutual decision, but if it's only the idea of spouse A, and spouse B just goes along with it to make spouse A happy, I feel like spouse A doesn't trust spouse B. Not necessarily true. Just my opinion.

So we have these little blocks of cedar that have been in the closet for years and I took them out tonight because they had stopped making the closet smell nice. I've just been sitting here smelling them since then. I think cedar is one of my favorite smells, along with home depot, and the smell in the air before rain, and freshly cut grass, and old books or records. Hehe. ;-)
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In all seriousness though...

Today wasn't the best day ever. It wasn't horrible or anything. Nothing crazy happened. Ashlee (my girlfriend) and I kinda had a disagreement or not really a disagreement but something. I don't really remember what it was. Regardless, grandma and I went out for a little while today but thinking about the fight or whatever didn't help.

While I was driving today, I stopped so an ambulance could pass. I was the one who rode along in the ambulance with grandpa the day he died. I was the one sitting in the ambulance as they tried to revive him but couldn't. Seeing and hearing the ambulance today brought it all back, and, for the first time, I realized that I really hate ambulances. They make me think of him and make me want to break down crying.

I miss grandpa so much. There are moments that I feel so confused and overwhelmed by life, and sometimes I just want his guidance and advice. =(

And please don't leave comment(s) saying "he's in a better place" and "let the lord guide you" and other such things. I don't need or want little cliche sayings. They might be true but they're annoying and if you can't think of something more insightful to say besides recycling old cliches, then don't say anything at all