Life... To Be Continued

It's a lot harder than it seems.

Parents say that college and a career are essential in life, even if it's something you hate. As long as it makes good money. The "American Dream" some would call it. "That's just the way it is. That's life."

Good ol' religious folk say you have to know proper theology and doctrine, and don't get me wrong, that's not necessarily bad, but so many people seem content to do just that and only that. Sure, you can know doctrine and theology, old and new, but what good does it do if you just KNOW it and don't do anything with it, or worse, use it as a tool of hatred, just as the Pharisees.

Politicians say you have to focus on this issue or another, pick one side or another. Which one is it? Left, right, republican, democrat, abortion, gay marriage, the environment? What if you care about issues on both sides? What if things aren't as black and white as they seem?

The past year I've been working a job I absolutely hate. My goal was to buy a car and pay it off, something that has been completed for awhile now, but I'm still there... because of the money. Most people would say that's a good enough reason, but I believe there is more to life than that. I refuse to believe that just because a majority of people say that that's just the way life is, that it has to be that way.

The last couple of months I've been saying to God, "Lord just tell me what to do, show me what to do, because I'm slowly dying here." A couple of weeks ago, He answered. A friend asked me to go on a mission trip to Mexico with a few other people. Now, if you has asked me a year ago to go on a plane, or a mission trip, I would have said "thanks, but no thanks." This time, I said yes instantly. I didn't think about it, I just said yes. In order to go, however, I have to quit my job, which I am perfectly fine with. Yes, it's a risk. Yes, it was a quick decision. So things go with God sometimes.

I heard a sermon a few weeks ago that really caught my attention. In it, a speaker named Jay Pathak, said something along the lines of "you'll know you're going the way you're supposed to go, because you'll face incredible resistance." Because why would the enemy bother with someone who isn't doing anything to hurt him? I know I answered correctly because resistance has come. I have seemed to face temptation more this last couple of weeks than I have in awhile. Temptation, worry. So many thoughts began to rush through my head after I committed to the trip. What if the plane crashes? What if I get shot in Mexico? What if grandma gets mad at me or can't afford her house anymore? What will I do about money? And then as quickly as it came, it went away. It wasn't that those thoughts went away exactly, but more that the Lord just said "I'll be there, no matter what. I will provide. Just let go." I've heard this said plenty of times in my life, but it seems like it has suddenly clicked. The fear of death, not having enough... it's all gone. Buying more records or movies or video games or what have you, even some relationships... I've let everything distract me and hold be back... and it all just left me empty.

The minute I said yes and took a leap of faith, the resistance came stronger than it had in a very long time, maybe stronger than ever, but since that moment, I have felt more alive than I ever have in my life.

So many opportunties pass us by every day and we, as a society, and even/especially as "followers" of Jesus hardly even notice anymore. Apathy, conformity, animosity, materialism, even religion in many ways, have all become "weapons of mass distraction."

I don't know what life will bring once I get back from the trip. To be honest, I'm not that worried about. I believe He will provide. All I do know is that I don't want to sit still anymore. I don't want to stay here in my comfortable house being bored. I want to be out there, going wherever He leads me, into whatever circumstances He leads me, trusting in Him, and becoming closer to Him and those brothers and sisters He has put into my life to encourage me and others around me... even if it costs me my life (figuratively or literally).

=)